


promises that cannot be healed

by kittyslies



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Angst, F/M, One Shot, Sad, Sad Ending, but not really, im sorry, no happy ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-09
Updated: 2020-08-09
Packaged: 2021-03-06 07:41:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,780
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25809796
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kittyslies/pseuds/kittyslies
Summary: he was distant, constantly breaking on the promises that were meant to keep her comforted.and it was the last snap of a thread for her.
Relationships: Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir/Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug
Comments: 1
Kudos: 30





	promises that cannot be healed

**Author's Note:**

> hello! it's been a very long time since I've written anything or updated any of my fics :( so this is my first fully written work in months! i apologise for my lack of writing on my other fics, school has been hectic and i lost a lot of motivation and inspiration, so I'm not exactly sure if I will finish those :( 
> 
> yes, this is a sad one shot, but i may write a sequel to this! other than that, happy reading <3

_You always break a heart when you break a promise_

There’s silence which evades the room. The room that seemed tiny when she walked in. But now, well, now there’s the massive distancing space between the both of them. Hollow sounds of the crisp wind from outside flushing their cheeks as they attempt to catch their breaths.

It had been a never-ending night, and they still hadn’t sorted the main problem. In his eyes, the solution was sitting in front of them– they would simply carry on like before, before all of it blew up in their faces.

A sharp breath from one side of the room, the room he dragged her in oh so many times before – but it wasn’t the same, not anymore. “You told me, you looked me in the eyes, with your heart on your chest, promising that you wouldn’t do this again. I gave you chance after chance, Adrien. But I’m tired.”

_But honestly, the dishonesty was killing me_

He had been staring at a picture frame just outside of her figure prior to her words, wanting to focus his attention on something that didn’t resemble the pain he currently felt. But it was no use trying to divert his focus from her, she was captivating in every way possible – even in a situation like this.

So, when his eyes shifted back to her small, petite figure, gliding over her features, his heart soared. The tint of tears in her eyes, with the glossy outline, a tear holding itself back with a struggle, she looked as if she was carrying a massive pressure.

That was the one thing about Marinette. Even with him, even with the comfort and safety he gave her, the barrier of protection he promised to always shoulder her with, it was never enough to break her walls down. Nothing could suffice to allow her to show a moment of weakness. Perhaps, it was the industry she grew up with that made her into such a way, but Adrien didn’t pinpoint it.

_But the truth always comes out_

_In the silence, it rings loud_

If the tears in her eyes spoke for anything in their silent form, it was that he really messed up this time. _Fuck_.

Their previous arguments had never once ended in the state they were currently in, they were always, _always_ , able to work things out, to fix things in the way that no one had ever come close to. Because it was them, Marinette and Adrien – the couple that fought anything together, whatever it took to make it right again, they would do it.

But, now, Marinette was breaking into pieces in front of his two eyes. And there was absolutely nothing he could do to make it right. Because it was over. It was over because of him, because he couldn’t get his head straight, because he couldn’t have pushed it that extra mile, because he simply didn’t pay enough attention to his surroundings. If he had just opened his eyes and realised it earlier, then this wouldn’t be happening.

_When there’s smoke there’s a fire_

Adrien doesn’t speak. His mouth keeps gaping open, just that little bit, gasping for something to say but she takes his silence and carries on.

“You know,” a soft scoff, “I seriously thought this time would be different. I had hopes that we wouldn’t end up in that place again. I was practically begging that we wouldn’t end up there. Because I don’t want that with you, I don’t want the constant fights and the bickering, I don’t want the arguments and the cold shoulders, I don’t want that. I want you, Adrien, I want _you_.” The emphasis broke him. Just like it broke her to say it, to come forward about it, with just the little strength she was hanging on with. It was a cracked word. The meaning of it heavy to his ears, but how it sounded so lifeless and empty when it hit him, he would never figure out.

He should have stepped forward and told her she could have him, that he was here for her and he was never leaving, that he’d do anything and absolutely everything to make her happy. But he didn’t. He stood there, reflecting his now own glossy haze back at her, at a loss for words. There was no fighting it now.

_Now I know what you see_

_When you look at me_

He knew she wasn’t finished, so he had no choice but to stand, his heart cracking at every word and every phrase that her lips spoke of.

Sniffling as she tilts her head toward the ceiling, thinking of her next words, and he can see she is exhausted. Exhausted of the whole situation, with nothing to make her ease. The temptation of reaching out and holding her, now, shaking, fragile hands as they grip the sides of the silky material, never faded. But, he couldn’t, it wasn’t his place.

His eyes watching as the grip slowly loosens and she flicks her eyesight back at his contact – they were emotionless, the patch of sleepiness sewed in here and there but, for the first time in their relationship, he couldn’t read her.

Then her quiet, soft voice is filling the room once again. “You once told me, in the beginning, that we would never make promises we can’t keep, promises that lose their meaning every time they are broken. I kept to that. I kept to that because I was falling madly in love with you and I wanted everything with you. I never once doubted that you wouldn’t hurt me, that you were feeling the same as I was. But it became too difficult to believe after a while. I was no longer sure of where we stood.” A pause.

“The first time…” Her voice trails off as it cracks a wound in her throat, failing to place together a complete sentence, and he is begging under his breath that she won’t speak of the first time, hoping they’ll let that scar keep healing. But it’s no use, she is pulling herself together, fingers now gripping one another, and he can tell she’s about to open it back up again.

_But when the words slipped, it struck like_

_lightning_

And it’s the first time his voice is heard in the silence. “Marinette, please don’t.” He cuts in before she can breathe another word. She looks somewhat surprised at his words, that his voice is so quiet he is barely audible. Her ears perch up as he speaks, the extreme softness of the three words are quick to travel to her own space.

They don’t let go of the constant eye contact now, it’s one pained individual speaking to another, from the exact space it hurts.

“I can’t keep doing this, Adrien.”

He cuts in before she goes on, “what about the company?”

And it’s those four words that sit heavier with her than anything he’s spoken of to her before. Now, she is no longer pained, no longer just full of hurt, but she’s also extremely frustrated – frustrated of fighting with him, frustrated of not having the one person she could always count on holding her as she crumbles with every cracked breath. 

Marinette cannot configure what she could possibly say to that, because even if she did, the fight would be never-ending.

Instead, she takes a deep breath, blinking back the cruel tears she never wanted him to see, and certainly not the ones he had caused, and looks straight on. She catches his gaze immediately, as his stare is no longer lingering behind shut lids but gliding over her complexion.

There is no response from her, both standing still in the cool air, and Adrien cannot take his eyes off her glossy ones.

_I caused this. This is because of me. She’s standing there, breaking into pieces, because of me._

_And there’s absolutely nothing I can do._

The thoughts are heavy, they’re heavy with pangs of pain, heavy with agony, heavy with every aching emotion Adrien could climb against.

A sniffle. “I’m tired.” She says at first, but he knows she’d not finished.

“I’m tired of fighting, Adrien. I am so, _so_ tired.” Her voice breaks, weakening at the end words and his heart shatters at the sound.

He watches as she wipes the fallen tears from her rosy cheeks, and it is a sight he never wants to see. Because it is a sight that will haunt him in the most agonising way.

All he wants to do is pour his heart out to her, to hold her so she doesn’t fall apart, any more so than he has already caused her to. He wants to stand by her, holding her hand as they conquer anything that is thrown and tossed in their way. He wants to kiss her, to feel her soft lips as he wipes away those salty tears of hers with his own thumb, to tell her that he’s here, to tell her that everything’s going to be alright.

But, silence.

It is the slight step he takes forward, the urge of wanting to hold her once more, for the last time.

But when she steps back as he proceeds towards her, he knows it’s really over.

_Afraid of losing you,_

_and so I bent the truth_

“Don’t.” She seeps out, it’s a harsh tone, one that he’s never heard her use with him. Never in the four years that he held her, kissed her, fought with her, left marks on her skin for it to shine in the morning glow the following day, had she once looked at him with more disappointment and agony than she did now.

There were a few moments of silence once again, the tip of his tongue carrying _I’m sorry,_ wanting, waiting to be released but it would make no difference. It would no longer be him holding her hand, him surprising her with the delicate flowers she adored so much but denied she didn’t like them, him holding her as they both fell asleep, cuddled against one another, as they basked in the warmth of one another’s body.

It was no longer him having the opportunity to tell her he loved her whenever he wanted.

Between all the fights and all the mistakes, all the arguments and misunderstandings, he thought there was a chance. A simple chance where he could make everything right.

And, now, it was a lost chance.

In and out of his thoughts, he hadn’t noticed Marinette was fiddling with _it_. Twirling it, twisting it, with everything in her yelling, _don’t take it off, fight for it, push a little further._ It was no use, she could no longer listen to the coherent thoughts racing, attacking every part of her clouded mind.

Because she had to put herself first, she had to, otherwise, there would be nothing left to fight with. So she did this for herself.

The heavy sound of the ring against the glass table made Adrien snap his eyes open, his head no longer in parallel with the wooden flooring.

He wanted to protest. He wanted to tell her this was insane. He wanted to tell her he loved her. He wanted to tell her she was the first thing on his mind in the morning and the last thing before he fell asleep right next to her. He wanted to tell he would fight harder than ever for her if they could just try again.

But he knew better.

Marinette had never looked so exhausted in her whole life that he had known her for, not when they were in high school, not when they were pushing through finals so they could graduate, not when she was building up her own fashion business, and not on the first night that they launched their company together. Never.

So, whether he wanted this or not, he had to let her go.

Marinette had managed to place a hard front, for the time being, clearing her features of any tears that were apparent and gripping the sides of her blouse once more, only to ensure she wouldn’t lose her composure, not again.

She glances between the ring and Adrien, and once more over at the door on her left, that had been hanging open for the past hour they had been standing in here for.

It’s the same steps she takes as he nods, taking in the full situation, but she isn’t approaching the door.

_She’s approaching Adrien._

He isn’t sure whether he’s hallucinating from the lack of sleep and lack of energy within his body, or whether Marinette is really standing just inches away from him, her heavy, but soft, breaths landing on his lips as she tilts her head upwards.

It takes him a few moments to realise she’s standing so close, with absolutely no proximity between them, and it leaves him confused. Not even a minute ago, he was the one initiating some closure of the distance but was denied it. But, now, her gaze was fully focused on him, on the green hues she was oh so familiar with, in every situation – it wasn’t new, but the disappointment and ache still managed to seep through.

_She’s looking at him with love._

He glances at the hesitation of her hands, whether they should stay where she’s managed them, or whether she should indulge in the feel of him once more.

The latter wins.

By the time he’s processed so much as the next second, her soft hands are at either side of his neck, with her thumb gliding along his skin, leaving the familiar trail of the pads of her thumbs in their wake.

“I need to let you go.” The words, that are struggling to be heard, can barely slip out before her lips are occupying his, the gentle pressure from her side as he drowns in the feel of her, every part of her attention driving him insane.

From his side, he is slowly running out of air as she fuels every last bit of him, leaving his lungs oxygen-deprived and his heart in an ache. The kiss is slow, but it’s tender, it’s longing, it’s _Marinette._ And there’s absolutely no one like her.

He isn’t exactly sure of how long they stand there, caressing one another, slowly following the rhythm they set and slanting his head when he aims to feel just that little more of her. They’re both melting into one another, mirroring so many instances of such a gesture before in this room.

But, he knows the moment is over, when she’s no longer locking him in a trance because the cold air now circulating in his lungs is a giveaway. He can finally breathe again, but he doesn’t want to. He wants her to wash all the air out of him again, to make him feel like he’s the only one she’s ever thought of. But it’s gone. It’s all gone.

It’s no use reaching out to her because in a matter of seconds, she’s already making her way out of the door.

And the last look she gives him is a look of pain, love, and exhaustion, all collided together in one. The small smile isn’t really there, it’s for the show – it’s so she can end the moment with what she believes is right, but it doesn’t reach her eyes and she knows Adrien knows she’s not there.

Neither of them are. Maybe they’ll never reach that place again, maybe they’ll never feel that joy as they stand across from one another again, maybe they’ll never find a love as strong as the one they held. But, for now, they had to keep going.

He’s lingering on lost words, all his thoughts panicking at what to say at this moment, it has never come to this – and now his lost chances and his lost opportunities at whispering all the things he kept on the tip of his tongue in the heated moments they shared, were all gone.

He’s unconsciously reaching out – wanting that last feel, that parting feel, but…

…but then she’s gone.

The cold air from the open window is swirling around him, and the sound of the lock from the door she proceeds out of is the last sound he hears caused by presence.

Then he is breaking down, tears flowing, arms curled around him, with nothing but his broken sobs to fill the large surrounding.

_She’s gone._

_You always break a heart when you break a promise._

_But sometimes,_

_It’s two hearts that are meddled with._

**Author's Note:**

> please leave kudos, comment, it helps to keep me motivated! my twitter is dahyukhei <3


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